Ooh La Long

Ooh la la.

Couch friendly herbals.

A tincture of thin, nighttime vampishness.

Ohh la Long.

A home theatre, a book with oppressed, marching ladies on the front cover.
A book about young pornographic poets.

A green candle with herbs and stones strewn methodically around it's base,
we call the base an 'alter'
not to be confused with a base you didn't pay for.

Basic needs, basic colors, basic prismatic spectrum, basic songs about Kenya.
Without a doubt, I see father of fire card, the emperor.
I have seen the card pop up, jump out, land on the floor, in front of the alter, incense burning for at least two years. Solid. Two years of a throne.
Two weeks of baited breath for no reason has me jammed up, and I don't know where the cotton goes anymore.
Now that the cotton-mouth is gone, I put a piece of cotton in my right ear.
I can't hear anything by the afternoon as I place an order for an Ooh-la-la-long tea and a serum of vitamin A.
It seems I can turn any local mall into a witch store if I want.
I host witchy kittens, a cat hotel.

Banana Lol Cat is coming to visit, but she doesn't know it yet.

The bat phone rang today on a false alarm.

Super-friends are too far away; I just want to walk to the beach.

You Say I Say

I feel today that my affliction for watching conspiracy movies has been cured.
I feel that my best girl friend has her work cut out for her. Seriously. There is no more conspiracy. It's truth. Some things are clear.

As for matters of the heart, I am learning to communicate better.
I read my horoscope, I try my best, I cannot tell the future, although I wish I could.
I don't know. It's not easy being close to me sometimes. That's purely from observation.

I mean, I can only go onto 'moving walks' instead of escalators and I can hardly bare the highway. When I am vulnerable, and I fight to stay safe. It doesn't work. It's totally ineffective.

Skeezes Bellerenges.
Before March 6th, things will be better. I am assured of this.

Fun Prevention at the Convention

Yesterday was the inauguration.
I had hell on escalators. The cold I expect when I enter the slope leading to hell.
Cages on the streets. Police officers (not searching my large suitcase full of electrical cords) and snapping the wooden parts off of flags... because they could be weapons?

I saw a little guy holding his flag up in the air.
Immediately, his father snatched the boy's arm and pushed the flag down,
"Don't let me see you point that flag again!"

( Snipers? A child assassin? What? )

Backward land.

I was baffled until I got home and realized that it was the last day of the previous administration.
Baffled.
Road blocks.
Fun prevention squads were everywhere.
Don't get me wrong, I have fun often and amply.

The squads just made it difficult, so I stayed in my cage and listened to the voice on the speakers. Tried to make friends. But, my legs and face froze off and I felt like some kind of bitter robot alien.

I can say that I was there, but this is about all.

Revolving Doors

I had a stroke of genius an hour and a half before now. I felt the poetry sitting on the couch, cat fishing. The fish were so big, they took the line away from me.
Much like a metaphor for this string of words I imagined. My 'learning disability,' as the young folks say, is that way. My mind goes too quick. I work hard, when the momentary genius fails to be written down. My mind goes to fast like a dry-erase board or etch-a-sketch shaken... like sands through the hourglass...
He said noone knew the internet would get this big. He said it wasn't made for 'applications'. Apps used to mean appetizers in the restaurant biz. That's how you abbreviated it on those little sketchy note pads.
I am reading a book about Visceral Realist poets. It is basically pornography so far. It's fine by me, because life is like that. Really, it is. And if yours is not, I do not apologize for saying so. That's why there's a period at the end of that sentence.
I worked hard this week, neglectful of my genius, and I built up some slack today. Rather, I cashed in on it. And more is due tomorrow the moment I wake up. I cash in on the work by opening my eyes and looking at the clock and righteously closing my eyes again, pulling the covers tighter, and letting my electrons do their own work on all the membranes while I sleep.
Do not underestimate sleep. Sleeping keeps you young.
Waking up in the morning ( when you are a sexy vamp ) makes you old.
There are some who like to pretend/ feel better than others by over-doing things, like running around in circles. Those circles are small, child, like the vacuum sound you hear when you enter a revolving door sucking the life out of you.
Yeah, THOSE circles will drag you down.
And I am not talking about how your mama said those kids at the movie theatre were hooligans and they would 'drag you down,' I am talking about the will to live. Dragging the will.

If I die, I want no one to attach a ball and chain to my will and drag it around. I don't even know what my will is, but I certainly do not want to be misrepresented.

The C.I.A. owns face book.

F.y.i., I signify.

Truth be told.
I heard, she said, he said.

I went to sleep last night whispering "Oh My Goddess," just like my buddy says in the computer lab. I thought of her tonight when I made a sweet potato in the oven and the catfish tried to get kleenex out of the box on the table.

I always think of Jeremy when I eat pizza.
I think of Melissa when I go to the gym.
I think of Donnon whenever I eat curried carrots.
I think of Trink whenever I buy shampoo.
I think of Gretch whenever I go to the airport.
I think of Sarah when I put on my face creams, take vitamins, break open vitamins to put them on my face and whenever I vacuum at 2am.

I think of a stranger when I look in the mirror.
My learning disability is cropping up again, here, now.

( ram das? )

I could be in full flight from reality without people. ( That's why I like them so much. )

Has anyone ever said, "You're Crazy" to you?
What about every day?
I was a teenager when my response began to be, "You're stupid."

Would you rather be stupid or crazy?

Ha. I never was too good at comebacks. I think I will write more next time.

I have CO-Q-10 and a Funny Feeling About this Week

I wrote a short essay yesterday morning as part of my writing discipline.
Jeremy and I spoke about this briefly before I left South Florida and he gave me a very professional -looking, well crafted, homemade journal.
There are two kittens in my house right now. They don't like me. but they have accepted my presence here, much like, I imagine orphans would accept a new boarder at the orphanage. I know that sounds backwards, since, I was here first, but for sake of detailed description, I give you my impression of their vibe toward me.
My life is not hard right now and I know it. My happiness hinges on one thing I have complete faith in. This one thing is like that grain of sand in the palm of the queen's hand at the end of the Never Ending Story. I have complete faith in applying that formula to the panel hanging from the hinge. At some places, the panel is made of wood, silk ribbon, chiffon, cement, (even, perhaps ), the skin of an earlobe, canary bird's eyebrows, pigeon wings. My life hinges on a delicate, yet unbreakable THING. And this thing cannot be discussed. It is my best friend. It is the brake fluid in my car. It is jet engine fuel, essential oil, herbal tea, and starbucks coffee. It is the vapor that comes from my mouth when I breath outside in the cold or when I pretend to smoke a cigarette.
It is in every 'Of Course,' and it is in every 'Perhaps' and likewise all declarative statements; All answers and all questions. It is plasma. It is tissue. It is molecule, cell, electron, mitochondria.
Back to the Co-Q-10, I imagine this supplement helps my mitos' and my heart, but only at very high doses.

A Little Distracted and Lots to Do

I look for paintings of candy.
I will paint some gummy sharks tomorrow.
I study other artists.
I come across many things, all of which had meaning
to someone at some time.
I find it hard to be interested in their interests,
when everything I am interested in is so interesting,
perhaps inter-arresting to me right now.

It is a day of wonder.

Yeah, yeah. I know.

A marvelous, yet uneventful day today.
I woke, went back to sleep after feeling truly charmed, of course.
The friend in the west has irksome admirers.
Another friend told me I am not spiritual enough ( and this is caused by or a result of my smoking, the language is not clear. I should eat apples. Go back to basics. )
The basics are there. I do almost everything I can do, so like, why attempt a guilt trip.

I know I know I know.

Waifs for Dinner?

I only had dreams of war.
And I was awoken by a koala-like man who seemed to be running in his sleep, gently, although not disturbing, until a sneeze prompted an "O.M.F.G." from his lips. And then I knew someone had a little too much internet coursing through his veins.

Double that with a quad mocha and you too can experience the magic.
Rather, the Magi.
I've got my eye on you, but only my third eye, because watching these days is lame. I want to experience and interact.
I had a lovely, and I mean lovely, drag queen over for dinner tonight.
We had leftover fesenjan while my mother did her laundry. It was a strange turn of events, but it's all in a day for a girl like me.
Yes, I am still a girl at heart.
My job is to paint and write poems and read books and host with sparkle.

I did my job well. But, now I need to lose five pounds.
The only worse thing than being cold, is being fat and cold. So, there. And, maybe it's the other way around, you know? Sitting around and eating comfort food will have to turn into running around on a hunger strike soon, or else, you know? Of course you do.

Sleep Again, Now

Be here now again.

That's a book about Ram Das or something.
He was old.

My house is old. That's why there's noises.
I get it during the day, but at night it can be unnerving.

I gravitate toward the light.
My fan sounds like a lawn mower outside.
I can pretend I live near a condo-complex where they do yard work for you.
He asked why I don't do some gardening.
I don't have an answer.

The horoscope says I have a green thumb, so I could.
I have been known to talk to flowers when no one is around.
And I do like potato bugs.
And having dirty arms.
Usually it's from painting that I get messed up with color on my forearms.

Dirt will do.

Tomorrow is tuition day. I fight. I plead a case, return a paper, get ready for school.
Art supplies take the place of books this January.
It will be a month to remember.

( parties for sure ensue )

Earplugs are Safe

It's a safe bet to keep earplugs around.
Except when you want to hear everything.

Since I was a child, I have had troubles of the ear-variety.
I had surgeries. And now and then, if I go to the doctor, they will
pull aside an intern to see what a 'perforation' looks like.

I don't know if it was my club days or all the childhood earaches, but I can't hear.
I am like an old person, "what?"

( no, no, I am not questioning what you said, i just didn't hear you )

Repeat.
Repeat.
Please, just one more time.
Just say the last part, not the whole sentence...
the part that sounded confusing to me.

I guess I guess a lot about what people intend to say.
It's not
that I am not listening,
and although, sometimes, I might not care,
I definitely can't hear you.

So, please repeat what you said:

Your vote doesn't really count?

How many billion dollars do you give to fund wars?

Hold on. I really need you to say that again. Just the last part.

First

I woke up and spun around in circles this morning looking for James.
He cleaned my house, but he wasn't around.
Everything was in order except my feet and my thoughts because I was looking for him in the basement again, but he was on the highway.
I watched current events on the internet and I was scared.
My friend from Bermuda called from Florida.
My friend from school called from downtown.

Bermuda is as corrupt as downtown. That's how it is.
I have countries battling in my head.
I see hip hop lyricists battling on a video stream sitting on my lap.

The white box tells me everything I need to know.
I wonder if I will lose my social skills. I wonder where I will be living one year from today.

.....It will be a place with a courtyard or at least a yard with a table and chairs.
There will be a flowering tree there nearby.
There will be cats outside. There won't be too many children around.
( I be the star child. You be the sun. )
I will be able to walk to work or ride my bike if I want.
I will feel safe when I walk around the block and it will be warm weather almost all the time.
The rooms at my house will not feel confining......

That's boring stuff, though.