These are the ramblings of a madman.

Tonight was pleasant but not magical.  It is a Saturday and there is rabble rousing a floor below us.  I may need earplugs to stay asleep.

We fly out tomorrow and I am ready to be home.  I am scared to fly, but after the two rides on buses through the mountainous  highway, I will feel much safer in an aeroplane.

I am sleepy and have been in bed at 8 or 9pm a few times on this trip.  It's hard to get around here and hard to get acclimated. Once you get used to things it's easier, but then you are going home!

I can't wait for my next trip.  Next time I will take little planes back and forth and skip the scenic route.

I am homesick for my cat and I am restless.  It's the fourth of july weekend and there is a full day off after we return. Did I mention I cannot wait to be home?

It's a dichotomy!  Can't wait to come back, but also want to be in my own space!

There is a lot of uncertainty surrounding me right now with regard to what i will be doing and WHERE i will be doing it and WHO I will be doing it for.

Of course I am at a pivotal age.

I have seen some women that I have really liked, but a few specific people that are a TYPE who are not secure and that insecurity is why I don't look to them as role models.   They only made it so far on a career path and got stuck.  They were hung up on people or loyalty to an employer who didn't promote them and spent the best years of their life doing something that didn't serve them.

I want a purpose.  I don't qant to waste my ambition.  I want to operate on faith.